How to silence your inner critic!
Our inner critic is that inner voice that tells us we aren’t good enough, we are failing, we cant do whatever we are trying to do. Its those endless questions we ask ourselves, ‘why did I say that’ I should have done this’ Sound familiar?
This inner voice will cause negative and overwhelming thoughts which in turn robs us of our confidence and joy of life. This judge or voice inside mocks and teases us, make us doubt ourselves and stops us from living our best life. The inner critic leaves us feeling exhausted every day as fighting a battle continually in our heads is incredibly draining.
We can choose to be dominated by our inner critic or choose to listen to the wise higher self within us which often has become silenced by the critical judgemental mind.[Tweet “The one thing we can control is how we treat ourselves and that can change everything”]
Firstly we have to become aware of when our inner critic takes control and what it is saying to us. Identify it as the voice that you don’t want to listen to! We then become the listener rather than a participant.
Challenge yourself to observe situations where your inner critic becomes powerful. Journal about the situation, the belief system that you have and what the consequences then are.
For instance, if your inner critic seems to be shouting at you most when you are parenting, or are at work……learn to observe what is happening when this starts and how it spirals out of control. If we catch our negative inner critic before it starts to escalate, we often can stop potential situations happening.
Thoughts are merely thoughts, we often forget that and sometimes we allow our thoughts to completely control our life and dominate and shape our world. It creates pressure and unhappiness. Become aware of your repeated pattern of thoughts and self criticism.
Choose to acknowledge your inner critics presence but don’t let it control you. Take control back and gently allow your confident voice to blossom and flourish instead.
This could simply be:
‘Today I accept that I always do the best I can. This is all I can ever do’
‘Today I release the need to compare myself to others. I am unique in my own way’
‘I choose to treat myself as I would a small child. I accept that sometimes I will make mistakes. I now give myself permission to make mistakes and develop each day’
‘I choose to treat myself gently, kindly and with patience’
‘In each moment, I have the opportunity to start again’
By doing this alone, you begin to take personal responsibility and this will lead to great freedom, confidence and happiness.
If we judge people, situations and experiences with unrealistic expectations, maybe blow things out of proportion, dwell on the negative and assume we know what others are thinking our inner critic is in control.
Choose to see your ‘confident voice’ as your best friend, your ally, your victor over any inner critical thoughts and feelings.
Some great mantras to say when that inner critic starts to control you is:
So what? Why not? Does it really matter?
This is one of my favourites – ‘Does it really matter if I am ………………………..or not?
Begin to listen to your confident inner voice and repeat endlessly your new thoughts and beliefs. This will reprogram your brain.
A powerful tool in silencing our inner critic is daily meditation. It helps us connect the mind and body and unconscious and conscious thoughts. It helps us identify negative thoughts and emotions and work through them and eliminate feelings which are unhelpful to us. Meditation is a powerful tool to inner peace, confidence and tuning into our higher wisest confident voice. There are lots of books on the benefits of mediation and Youtube is full of guided meditations which can really help. Even spending time in solitude gazing at a candle flickering or listening to some beautiful music can help too.
Visualise the best version of you. Form an image of the most wise confident self assured version of you. Create this as a college, or scrapbook. Create in your mind an idea of how you will be in your every day life as you develop and listen to your confident inner voice more and more. What would life look like? How would you feel? What would you be doing?
This is such a powerful way of silencing the inner critic and tuning into your confident empowered self instead.
By making the choice to silence your inner critic and developing powerful daily strategies, you will find over time your confident inner voice begins to take control more and more and overtime your inner critic becomes the silent observer no longer capable of destructive thoughts and feelings.